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I have something BETTER than chocolate.#Riker-#11117
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If computers take over (which seems to be their natural tendency), it will serve us right.#Alistair Cooke-#13729
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No human thing is of serious importance.#Plato-#20132
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Eat any good books lately ~ Q#-#6570
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Keyboard error: keyboard not detected. Press Return to continue.#-#16997
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Be a loof; aren't you sick of being a lert?#-#3390
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If we are to begin packaging ourselves as boxes of cereal, Democracy will die... for you could not win the presidency without proving unworthy of the job.#Adlai Stevenson-#14372
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Calling J-Man Kink. Calling J-Man Kink. Hash missile sighted, target Los Angeles. Disregard personal feelings about city and intercept.#-#4283
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ARTHUR'S LAW OF LOVE: People to whom you are attracted think you remind them of someone else.#-#2969
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He would always rush in where fools fear to tread.#-#9107
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Any sufficiently advanced bug is indistinguishable from a feature.#Kulawiec-#2736
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He has a mind like a steel sieve.#-#8874
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Go ahead and use my father's words against me. We'll see how crafty you can be when I fill you full of margaritas......#Ken Nagle-#8197
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Never eat between snacks, unless it's a meal.#-#19812
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Criminal Lawyer" is a redundancy."#-#26
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Given the choice between accomplishing something and just lying around, I'd rather lie around. No contest.#Eric Clapton-#8171
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Night of the living dead chipmunks#-#20071
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Help! I'm lost somewhere in the Generation Gap.#-#9344
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Are you kidding? I love museums. Of course, nothing beats a good nap.#Seinfeld-#2906
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And now for something completely different... a man with three buttocks.#Monty Python-#2538
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A fool and his money are my two favorite people.#-#801
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Inside every large problem, there is a small problem trying to get out.#-#15494
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Amnesia is not knowing who one is and wanting desperately to find out. Euphoria is not knowing who one is and not caring. Ecstasy is knowing exactly who one is... and still not caring.#Tom Robbins-#2305
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Email to Hillary Clinton should be adressed to root@whitehouse.gov.#-#6685
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All my life, I've been wanting to talk, really talk, but no one wants to listen. You know what that's like?#Jerry Maguire-#2005
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Let there be many windows to your soul, that all the glory of the world may beautify it.#Ella Wheeler Wilcox-#17353
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82.8% of all statistics are made up on the spot.#-#448
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Debate, n.: What lures de fishes.#-#5448
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How far you go in life depends on your being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving and tolerant of the weak and strong. Because someday in your life you will have been all of these.#George Washington Carver-#9828
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He's got a face only a mother could love. On payday.#Hudsucker Proxy-#9150
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If you want to succeed as a jester, you need to consider each person's auricular; What is all right for B might quite scandalize C, because C is so very particular!#W.S. Gilbert-#14872
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I had to leave a design meeting to go to the can and restrain myself from puking. I've never seen such an incredibly poor excuse for a software system as the crap I'm supposed to be building & reviewing here. Elegance? Simplicity? A thought-out architectu#Ron Resnick-#10921
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But soft, what bird through yonder window breaks?#-#4133
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His head is like Sputnik. Look at that noggin.#So I Married an Axe Murderer-#9568
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I'd like to see a nude opera, because when they hit those high notes, I bet you can really see it in those genitals.#Jack Handey-#12625
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He's dead Jim. You get his tricorder, I'll get his watch#-#9134
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I even bubble if you pop my cork just right.#Jon Gillespie-#10737
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Feel disillusioned? I ve got some great new illusions.
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Computer genius and billionaire Bill Gates' wife is pregnant. Gates explained, 'Don't let the name Microsoft fool you.'#Conan O'Brien-#4919
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I thought I'd include the introduction. Why is it at the end, though? Does that make it a contradiction?#Megan Coughlin-#12031
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Angst: You've seen it (you know you have) late at night, in a mirror. It has deep, hollow eyes - too exhausted to close - and looks like someone you thought you knew.#Dirk John Fischer-#2624
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DEVICEHIGH: Your device driver on drugs.#-#5576
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Is that liquid nitrogen?#Real Genius-#15650
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It is a good thing for an uneducated man to read books of quotations.#Winston Churchill-My Early Life#15781
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I can't use Windows. My cat ate my mouse.#-#10377
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Go away.#-#8205
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A celebrity is a person who is known for his well-knownness.#-#623
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In these matters the only certainty is that nothing is certain.#Pliny the Elder-#15383
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Gymming? No, I'm missing a fifth of my big toe...#Rohit Khare-#8570
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I accidentally installed the deer whistles on my car backwards. Now everywhere I go, I'm chased by a herd of deer.#Steven Wright-#9982
